Open letter to Nintendo

Dear Nintendo:

RE: DSI


Hey Nintendo, how are you? Thanks for the new Smash Bros game last year. It's pretty sweet. Still haven't really made good use of my Wii Fit yet, but that's really my fault, not yours. I appreciate the effort you've put into recreating a lot of the classics for my DS though. Dragon Quest IV? Chrono Trigger? Ys I & 2? Ok, that last one I'd never heard of, but the idea is still the same. So, everything's good with me. Finished EO a while back, still struggling with Phantom Hourglass, and plugging along at DQIV.


So... I guess I'll come right out and ask. What the fuck is up with the DSI? I thought we were friends, you and I. We go back man. Like, way back. Remember when the NES first came out? I do. I was like, 5 or 6 and mom and dad bought one for "me". Sure, the only game they got for it was Lee Travinos golf, but that was ok! I still played it and loved it! Then when I got older, remember that? Dragon Quest, Final Fantasy, Nintendo Power? Yeah, I was still stepping out on you, going to the arcade after school, but I was young and didn't know any better. And those times I went to my cousins to play Sega? That was just sowing some wild oats, it didn't mean anything. Sure, I loved Alex in Wonderland, but did it compare to Mario? Of course not! And did Sega have the 20's, 40's and 100's in ones like you did? Of course not! Super Mario 3? Are you kidding me? The game that was so good that it spawned a movie!

The gameboy? I remember that birthday. I do, it was bittersweet. Dinner out with the family, nice trip to the city, the new mario game? True Grandma ruined it by being drunk and missing it, but at least I had that green and grey dot matrix screen to ease that pain. And Tetris with Travis's mom? I remember that vividly.

Then the SNES came out. Remember those times? Mom brought it home for the weekend from the video store and it didn't have to go back until Monday? Remember how I cut school that afternoon to stay home and play Super Mario World? Star worlds, Yoshis, Koopa Kids? I loved those things. Mario Kart? Fuck yeah!

Some might say the N64 was a bit of a misstep, but you tried your best with it, and I know that you had the best intentions! Is it your fault I had to look on wikipedia to remember any of the games? No! Just because I didn't like the Zelda games doesn't mean I stopped loving you!

Remember right before the gamecube came out? I was so hyped about I could barely contain my excitement. Sure, I had kind of fallen away from gaming then, but that was ok, because I still remembered you. Even Luigi's mansion looked good! And when that gamecube did release, I went out and got one, didn't I? Luigi's mansion, Mario Kart, Resident Evil. Red Faction II with all the guys from the warehouse? One of the highlights of the time.

You ruled the handhelds, and I know that. Game Gear? Hell No, but I'm sure I bought a Gameboy color, probably a gameboy mini, and of course the gameboy advance. When the SP came out, I upgraded, and I was only a little bit resentful that it was the first time a Nintendo handheld had a backlit screen.

What did you do then Nintendo? You released Crystal Chronicles and Four Swords adventure, promising hours of untold fun with my friends if we all had SP's and gameboy link cables. I trusted you Nintendo, and so I bought 3 more SP's and the link cables. Was it fun? Of course it was! The functionality between the two was incredible, and the technology, for the time, was mind-blowing, but where were the rest of the games Nintendo? I spent hundreds of dollars in getting this setup, for two games? And then you abandoned the idea!

So we both moved on from there, didn't we? I started playing the XBox, andyou gave up on the SP's. I knew we were growing apart, but didn't know what to do about it. The Xbox just had more to offer me at the time. I didn't like it anymore than you did, but we had both just changed too much.

But then you got me back. The DS came out and rekindled our relationship. It might have took a while for you to find your footing, but you got there, and I love my DS. The DS Phat wasn't pretty, but it served a purpose, and when it got stolen from my car (did you have anything to do with that Nintendo? Was that your way of getting me to switch to the lite?, what did I do? I went out and bought 2 DS Lites, one for me, and one for Charity. And yes, she hates games, but she didn't mind Nintendogs one bit! And of course there was the wifi connectivity. Maybe we didn't play any Lego Star Wars, but we could have!

And now what have you gone and done Nintendo? You've developed the DSI. When we went from the SP to the DS, it was a huge jump. And from the Phat to lite, it was a smaller jump, but still an improvement. But this Nintendo? A DS that plays Mp3's and has a camera? For what? I have a phone that does that, and probably better! Is it because I have a PSP too now? I don't even use the PSP to play music, and the novelty of the movies on it wore off quickly. And if that wasn't bad enough, you're planning on releasing DSi specific games, to force my hand? Is this how it ends Nintendo? With the DS fading off into the sunset, and our relationship coming to an end?

At least we had a good run. Our relationship has had its ups and downs, and we've certainly weathered a few storms together, but I guess we just have different views on life now. I just want to be able to keep buying games for a system that I enjoy, and that is still relevant, and you want to keep making small iterations on your hardware. I don't think I'll buy a DSi, and when the upgraded Wii comes out, I don't think I'll get that either. You've watched me slip away more and more, turning to the welcoming embrace of Microsoft, and done nothing compelling to get me to stay. You've got your soccer moms, your uneducated children, your grandparents, and I guess that's what enough for you. You probably won't remember me when I'm gone, but I'll certainly remember you.


Wii want to play? Not anymore we don't.